October 17, 2020

Dancing Through The Cosmo

California is a whimsical place. The air here smells sweet and earthy, just like herbs left out to dry. It is my mission this year to figure out which local plant gives off that fragrance. The air is so dry. On hot days it feels like the warm burst of air when you open a hot dryer, on cooler days   It feels like a dry house in winter. Everything rattles in the breeze because all the plants have gone through summer with minimal water. It might be fall, but the trees are only losing leaves to the dry heat.  But I love it, especially the coolness of the night….

September 26, 2020

Home Is Where He Is

I have been here a day shy of a month already. I have already completed my first week of school. I have already made community and friends that call me their own. I have already seen God fulfill the long awaited hopes and dreams of the past three years. And we are just getting started. I won’t lie and tell you that everything has been hunky dory the whole time. But this is home for me. Not necessarily the place I reside, but my home is in God’s will and favor. I feel it all over this season. This is me, and this is where I am supposed to be. …

September 6, 2020

Settling In

Hello! It has been almost a week since I have been on my own in California. My house now feels like a home, Redding is starting to become familiar, and my roommates are becoming fast friends.  What is Redding like? The mountains loom in the distance behind swaying pine and palm trees. It’s hot, the kind of heat that if you sit in it for too long, you turn into a shriveled up raisin. But that’s how I like it. Town is walking distance everywhere and the library is open. The people are extremely kind and have been very welcoming in every situation.  What is my townhouse like? We have…

September 3, 2020

The Great Pilgrimage

Hello! The great pilgrimage to the west was a success. I am now in the process of settling in my new home. I wanted to share a few highlights from my sixteen day road trip.   I am now adjusting to my new home. It has been fun to settle in and start to really be on my own. I look forward to the days to come. I put out more updates soon.  From me to you, -Emily Jacobsen 

August 13, 2020

The Urge To Jump

Somehow, even when one pushes for and craves change, when that change comes it still leaves you feeling helpless. Like a downward plummet right after you jump. Even though you made the decision to jump, doesn’t mean that you can control the outcome. In that free fall, your left wishing for nothing more than to be on that safe ledge again. But scrambling for safety will only leave you panicked and the landing rough. Better to embrace the fall.  See you when I land. From me to you, -Emily Jacobsen 

August 7, 2020

The Last Goodbye

I feel the pain, will my heart stop beating? Sometimes it feels that way.  Goodbyes, why do they have to be a fundamental part of life? Every trip that I have come back from, every transition I have experienced, has left me with a goodbye on my tongue. I wish for nothing more than to spit it out.  Every missions trip has ended in tears for me. I grow attached and I long for those people and places. It has been over three years since I have left Cambodia… My heart feels physical pain every time I remember the friends and family I left behind, so far away from me….

July 31, 2020

Expectation VS Anticipation

I am really trying to learn how to anticipate the move of God, while not expecting it to look a certain way. Let’s be honest, life is a whole mess of unpredictable outcomes. I really want to grasp that God will move, but it won’t always look the way I understand or want it too. So many times in my life I have had expectations that have fallen flat to the ground. It always leaves me devastated. So I have been dialoging with God on ways to have faith, without filling in the blanks with my own plan. And that is when He introduced me to the concept of expectation…

July 17, 2020

The Walk Of Sleep

Sleep walking, am I awake or dreaming? Something that is less commonly known about me is that I sleepwalk. Oooh, scary right? I’m that creepy girl in the movies that walks with a dead gaze as if she were in another world. But in all seriousness, I started sleep walking as a child. My mother can account for that fact. I scared her half to death lurking next to her bed one night while I was still asleep. She told me to go back to bed. Like the obedient child I was, I listened even in my sleep and meandered back to bed. Fast forward to around two years ago,…

July 10, 2020

Sometimes Joy Sucks

“Joy is a sacrifice…there is joy in the sacrifice. There is joy in the suffering. Because it is in the suffering that we find out what is real. When we test the limits and can bend no more under the pressure of the pain. God meets us there. There is an ugly encounter with the truth of reality. We can choose to accept it and embrace it. Or we snap. If the latter is chosen then all is folly. But the former brings us dependence on God. That dependence leads to an unearthly joy that is chosen and not felt in the midst of the pain. To choose joy is…