May 15, 2021

That’s A Wrap!

Thats A Wrap!  I graduated last week. It is still surreal. I wish I could say that I was one hundred percent ready to graduate, but I can’t. A big part of me wishes I could rewind time and relive the last nine months.  I don’t think there is much I would have done differently, except to hold on to each moment a little longer. The last nine months were so sweet. Through each moment of pain, triumph, and celebration I lived the season to its fullest. Today I have been really reflecting on God’s kindness. He is so kind and it never ceases to amaze me. I am still…

February 12, 2021

Pain is in the Past, Right?

Time heals all wounds. Or does it?  Culture is so steeped in this concept. With the passing of time pain fades and heals. You forgive, forget, and move on. But where does all the pain go? Does it evaporate into thin air?  We live these lives taught to move on and be happy. “Don’t let the past define you!” Sometimes forgetting and moving on, ensnares you in the very thing that you are supposed to be getting free from. The idea of “Stay Positive!” and “Be Happy!” has raped society of the chance to actually feel and heal. God gave us emotions. That means all the emotions that are put…

January 1, 2021

One Hundred and Fifty Thousand

Happy new year everybody! For my first post in the new year, I want to share a dream and promise God has given me.  This time last year I was at a conference called movement 2020. During this conference, I had a very real encounter with the Lord. I could feel His love. It brought a lot of relief and freedom to my life. During this encounter, He clearly told me that He was going to give me one hundred and fifty thousand dollars. Crazy right?  But my God is not a small God, and it is well within His means to do so. Honestly, I dismissed it in the…

November 21, 2020

Mud

Mud. I felt is squish through my socks as I dragged my foot through the gravel. Wednesday night was raw in the best way possible. I was under a tent in the dark, worshipping Jesus in the mud. I love mud. It gets everywhere, even all over my dress as the hem dragged behind me. I danced in the mud and gravel with all my might, as praise was roared around me. I have never been happier to throw a pair of torn socks away. A stage. Saturday morning, I walked into Bethel’s sanctuary to dance for the first time. A five year dream was fulfilled that day. As the…

August 13, 2020

The Urge To Jump

Somehow, even when one pushes for and craves change, when that change comes it still leaves you feeling helpless. Like a downward plummet right after you jump. Even though you made the decision to jump, doesn’t mean that you can control the outcome. In that free fall, your left wishing for nothing more than to be on that safe ledge again. But scrambling for safety will only leave you panicked and the landing rough. Better to embrace the fall.  See you when I land. From me to you, -Emily Jacobsen 

August 7, 2020

The Last Goodbye

I feel the pain, will my heart stop beating? Sometimes it feels that way.  Goodbyes, why do they have to be a fundamental part of life? Every trip that I have come back from, every transition I have experienced, has left me with a goodbye on my tongue. I wish for nothing more than to spit it out.  Every missions trip has ended in tears for me. I grow attached and I long for those people and places. It has been over three years since I have left Cambodia… My heart feels physical pain every time I remember the friends and family I left behind, so far away from me….

July 31, 2020

Expectation VS Anticipation

I am really trying to learn how to anticipate the move of God, while not expecting it to look a certain way. Let’s be honest, life is a whole mess of unpredictable outcomes. I really want to grasp that God will move, but it won’t always look the way I understand or want it too. So many times in my life I have had expectations that have fallen flat to the ground. It always leaves me devastated. So I have been dialoging with God on ways to have faith, without filling in the blanks with my own plan. And that is when He introduced me to the concept of expectation…

July 17, 2020

The Walk Of Sleep

Sleep walking, am I awake or dreaming? Something that is less commonly known about me is that I sleepwalk. Oooh, scary right? I’m that creepy girl in the movies that walks with a dead gaze as if she were in another world. But in all seriousness, I started sleep walking as a child. My mother can account for that fact. I scared her half to death lurking next to her bed one night while I was still asleep. She told me to go back to bed. Like the obedient child I was, I listened even in my sleep and meandered back to bed. Fast forward to around two years ago,…

July 10, 2020

Sometimes Joy Sucks

“Joy is a sacrifice…there is joy in the sacrifice. There is joy in the suffering. Because it is in the suffering that we find out what is real. When we test the limits and can bend no more under the pressure of the pain. God meets us there. There is an ugly encounter with the truth of reality. We can choose to accept it and embrace it. Or we snap. If the latter is chosen then all is folly. But the former brings us dependence on God. That dependence leads to an unearthly joy that is chosen and not felt in the midst of the pain. To choose joy is…

June 26, 2020

Be Like Job Already

Job 19:1-6 Then Job answered and said: “How long will you torment my soul, And break me in pieces with words? These ten times you have reproached me; You are not ashamed that you have wronged me. And if indeed I have erred, My error remains with me. If indeed you exalt yourselves against me, And plead my disgrace against me, Know then that God has wronged me, And has surrounded me with His net. NKJV If you are like me, then you grew up hearing about how blameless Job was. In my mind as a child, Job was this perfect person who sat quiet and docile while everything near…